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When I was in high school, I was accepted to my best friend’s dream school.
She, unfortunately, was not.
And to make it even worse, it wasn’t my dream school, so I didn’t accept their offer.
Even though I know that my acceptance had nothing to do with her rejection, I couldn’t help but feel like I had taken an opportunity from her, and it was a really difficult situation to navigate.
To spare you the same awkward situation that I went through, I partnered with Lexie Fahey, an amazing therapist and one of my best friends. She works at Paradigm Malibu, a teen treatment center, and runs a therapy blog.
She shared her absolute best advice for friends going through this difficult situation and I must say, I truly wish I had heard her advice when I was in high school.
You’ll learn how to show compassion if you are the friend who was accepted, how to cope if you are the friend who was rejected, and how you both can heal from this unexpected mix-up and keep the friendship alive!
Here is Lexie’s best advice:
Situation #1: Your BFF was accepted and you were rejected
FEEL ALL THE FEELINGS!!! Don’t suppress them! We are human and deserve to give our feelings the space they need to be felt.
Situation #2: You were accepted and your BFF was rejected
The first thing to remember is that you can be happy for yourself. And you shouldn’t feel bad about that.
And if your BFF is feeling toxic (it happens) you can still comfort her and communicate empathy.
Situation #1 and Situation #2:
Here is some advice for both you and your BFF so that you can keep the #friendshipgoals alive and thriving.
Alexis Fahey is a Marriage and Family Therapist Trainee at Paradigm Teen Treatment Center in Malibu, CA. For more mental health wellness tips, you can check out her blog or follow her @yourtraumaguide on Instagram.